One Lie after the other. We had gone to California to become famous, Stars and actors in our own show. We had gone to San Francisco, not the place to break into the Films. He had a friend and I was so afraid of men that I held on tight to whatever he wanted. Then we came back. His friend had given us a room until we found our own place. I can’t ever really know what he was really thinking but we found an apartment and I got a job. This was a first step onto a path that there was no real knowledge between him and I, just he would go out clubbing, I would stay home to rest in preparation for my new Job. Being very tire of Gay bars was also a part of wanting to start a life as man and wife! I knew he was Gay when we married, I had been a beard for another man in College bedding a girl for his fraternity life. There was not being gay in my generation without great fear. I didn’t care at that time. I slept with them with them both as I had slept with my Mother till I was 12. Without a father and being the Dancing queen of this Bar; “Martha’s” in Rochester. I was crying for male attention that I had gotten at my fathers rifle range. I got it. Maybe he thought I could help him with male female sexuality. I could not! I got all the attention there in my Twiggy like persona. The dance he and I had were bodies so close in what was one step beyond a bump and grind. I was being swept off my feet and out of my mind!
